Transitioning

This is Celia, Danielle and Kirill's 11th day in Russia and my4th day and we have been in Moscow for the past 4 days. It is snowing almost everyday and the city it is in a constant state of overcast. It is as cold here as it was in Iowa, but not as much wind, so going out for walks everyday is reasonably well tolerated. We are staying at the Holiday Inn, and fortunately, most of the employees who work at the desk speak functional English. This has come in handy since we have no translator on this third and last adoption trip. We are really on our own. Kirill has melted down several times since I have been here, but nothing Celia and I have not been able to handle. We have come to realize from our understanding of the potential energetic and physical effects foods sometimes have on children's behavior that Kirill cannot eat sunflower seeds or too much sugar. Nor can he watch any cartoons or other television for that matter that involves violent themes. These stir up something deep within him that makes him irritable and tantrum prone. So we keep television limited to the Animal Channel and benign Russian cartoons (fairy tales and the like). Managing Kirill is all about energy management and early recognition of frustration from not being able to communicate. He is also much like a shark in water, full of movement and energy and constantly eating or snacking. As long as he sleeps well, eats good food, and does not watch bad T.V., he does very well. Celia and I twice to three times a day take him downstairs to the lobby and ask the English speaking employees to ask him if there is anything he wants to ask us or wants from us. This seems to keep him out of the realm of frustration, giving him the opportunity with communicate with us. Celia and I are desperately trying to learn as much Russian as possible to help matters as much as we can.

Overall, this transitional period is more representative of what were are likely to go through when we return to Iowa. After Celia and I were able to get Kirill to fall asleep last night (after midnight) we laughed at the fact that it had been some time since we had to manage outbursts, much like we did with Camille when whe was younger, and to a lesser extent Danielle. Both our daughters turned out to be great, well behaved kids; if we figure things out right with Kirill, he should follow suit.

The hotel is a very nice one, but smoking is allowed, and Russians guests and convention attendees take full advantage of this. The lobby and hotel restaurant smell constantly of tobacco, so we go to a national chain coffee house-restaurant (Kofye Haooze--phonetically translated) which has great food and coffee, and little smoking. At the gym here in the hotel, only Americans seem to be working out. Step outside the revolving main entrance door, and instantly noise, car exhaust and lots of people scurrying about greet you. Moscow is huge. We will probably not have an opportunity to see much from a tourist standpoint as Danielle is not handling the cold mixed with snow very well and you have to do a lot of walking to really explore the city. But the hotel has a very nice gift shop, and we are really looking foward to just getting this process over with and on our way home. I feel Kirill needs a sense of routine, and to see his good friend Danya whom he used to live with at the orphanage (now in Iowa with Barbara, his mama).

Two days ago we met at the U.S. Embassy and processed all paper work needed to legally leave Russia and legally enter the U.S. with Kirill. We waited in a medium sized room with numerous other American families who had children much younger than Kirill. Many parents were considerably older than Celia and I, and had children no older than two years of age. The American officials were very pleasant, and had processed our documents relatively quickly. We now wait for another individual named Alana to further process our documents so that we have a passport for Kirill. It admittedly makes me nervous every time I am asked to pay $300 here or $150 there to people I don't know to process our documents, but so far everyting has come through as we had hoped or expected. We have learned that we just have to trust the process.

We are due to see Dave Lentell and his daughter Nastia in two days. This should help Kirill to be able to speak Russian again. His occasional meltdowns notwithstanding, he really has been very patient with this last adoption phase. It is our understanding that if you explain to him well why we do the things we do as parents, he behaves just fine. Danielle's martial arts teacher Paul Green (who has also adopted Russian children) told me once that Russian adoptees need about 6 weeks to speak functional rudimentary English, and are usually fluent by 6 months. We feel Kirill will be no exeption.